By Carol Altmann

[dropcap style=”color: #a5cecd;”] A [/dropcap] little more than a year ago, Susie Alexander received the news that nobody wants to hear: the lump she had found in her right breast was malignant.

“I had a shower and I never really look at myself in the mirror, but this time I noticed a puckering on the right side of my breast. I felt around and felt a lump and thought, ‘oh no’. It made me feel quite nauseated, because, well…” Susie, from Warrnambool, said, her voice trailing away.

It was to be the beginning of a journey that, like only cancer can, turned Susie’s life completely upside down.

Susie, 49, was a nurse for 28 years and is married to paediatrician Dr Greg Pallas, so she wasted no time in having the lump tested the same day as she found it. That was a Friday, her step-daughter’s birthday, and the distraction of a party sleepover made the agonising wait for results over the weekend a little easier to bear.

A strong history of cancer on the matriarchal side of the family – her mother, Jan, died of lymphatic cancer last December – meant that Susie was highly conscious of the risk, but previous lumps detected in mammograms had proven to be harmless.

By the Tuesday, however, the result was confirmed as cancer and three days later Susie had the breast removed, together with 32 nodes under her armpit because of concern that they might also be cancerous.

“You have no time to think. I turned into a robot and I think I was a robot for 12 months thereafter because between Mum and myself, you just have to get on with it,” she said.

[dropcap style=”color: #a5cecd;”] A [/dropcap] layer-by-layer inspection of the removed breast brought more devastating news.

“(My doctor) came in and gave us the results: I not only had one cancer, but two cancers in that breast. Ductal and lobular. The lobular…was in 11 different areas of my breast, but it hadn’t shown up on the scans at all, because it is so minute,” Susie said.

“I was hysterical, I have never cried so much, because even though (the cancer) wasn’t in the nodes, I was not guaranteed of anything anymore.”

Given the insidious nature of Susie’s particular cancer, she made the seemingly radical decision to have her remaining breast off, even though scans had not shown any sign of disease.

“For me, it was an easy decision. Knowing what had happened with the lobular, there was no doubt I was going to have the left breast off. I just had this feeling about it that said ‘get that breast off,”’she said.

The left breast was removed last October and post-operative tests revealed ductal cancer in situ: cancer cells that are contained, but which can become invasive.

While a double mastectomy before the age of 50 is a psychological and physical mountain in itself, it has been the reconstructive surgery since that has been an equally demanding challenge.

[dropcap style=”color: #a5cecd;”] S [/dropcap]usie blames nobody, but feels the decision to have reconstructive surgery was “rushed” and, in hindsight, she wishes she had taken more time to recover emotionally and physically from the mastectomies.

Not only is the pre-implant process quite painful, where an expander is fitted into the chest muscle and gradually filled with a saline solution, but Susie has no sensation in or around the implants.

Worse, she has had life-threatening sepsis three times as a result of the reconstructions and been hospitalised for up to a fortnight each time.  A year on, Susie still requires surgery to fix the complications.

Yet here she is, alive, laughing, making art, and doing what she can to raise awareness and funds for breast cancer research and support. Just like last year, Susie will again lead a fundraising walk along the Warrnambool foreshore in early December.

“It is good for me, because as a survivor of cancer I want to be able to do something to help other women. I want to be able to help.”

Given her vitality, it is a shock to hear Susie say late in our interview that she has “a sixth sense” that her cancer will return.

It does not depress her, however, but makes her more appreciative of each day of wellness.

“You can’t afford to not live your life now. I try to live in the now and so that is how I survive. I don’t look into the future too much, or the past either, just the now.”

[box] Bluestone Magazine will provide updates on Susie’s foreshore walk planned for December to raise funds for the Breast Cancer Network Australia. You can read our story on last year’s event here.  To find out more about the Warrnambool Social Breast Cancer Support Group contact Ann at annkrause56@gmail.com or phone 0400 800 499. [/box]

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[dropcap style=”font-size: 60px; color: #A5CECD;”] I [/dropcap]n October, we brought you the story of Susie Alexander, from Warrnambool, who we nominated as one of our first quiet heroes for her inspirational approach to her fight against breast cancer.

At that time, Susie hoped she would be well enough after her series of often debilitating treatments to participate in the annual Sussan Women’s Fun Run held in Melbourne on December 8 to raise funds for the Breast Cancer Network Australia.

Unfortunately Susie couldn’t make it to Melbourne, because the health of her mother, who is also battling cancer, is deteriorating*. But she was determined to still do the 5km walk to fulfil the promise that she made to herself and to her dozens of supporters who had donated funds to the cause.

[dropcap style=”font-size: 60px; color: #A5CECD;”] S [/dropcap]o Susie held her own version of the Sussan Women’s Fun Run down at the Warrnambool waterfront and invited her friends, family and supporters to join her. They came on foot and on bicycles, with children, and with dogs and, by 9am, about 100 people were ready to walk for Susie, for her Mum and for everyone else who is facing the challenge of cancer.

It was one of those uplifting moments when people gather for a common cause and, in this case, to celebrate all that makes life so precious.

Thankyou, Susie, for reminding us of how even taking a simple walk by the sea is such a gift.

* (Susie’s mother, Jan, passed away peacefully on Dec 18, 2013).

[box] As of this weekend, Susie had raised $3500 toward the Breast Cancer Network Australia and donations were still coming in. She had set herself a target of $1000. [/box]

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[dropcap style=”font-size: 60px; color: #A02F2F;”] T [/dropcap]HIS week’s quiet hero is somebody rarely caught without a smile on her lovely face, even when life throws the greatest challenges her way.

Susie Alexander and I (Carol) went to school together at East Warrnambool Primary and later, Warrnambool High School, and because she was an Alexander and I was an Altmann, we tended to be in the same alphabetical order line-ups for the selection of the fun stuff (sports teams) and the not so fun stuff (innoculations).

I would joke that I was glad Susie had to go first, then I would know if it was going to hurt or not.

Susie was always much braver than me.

When I met Susie again for the first time in a long time, she told me her mother was very ill with cancer and that she was making the most of the time they still had together. We were suddenly at that age, it seemed, when our parents became vulnerable and fragile.

[dropcap style=”font-size: 60px; color: #A02F2F;”] E [/dropcap]arlier this year, I saw Susie again and she told me that she had been diagnosed with breast cancer. It is the sort of news that shrinks the world down to the small stuff, the important stuff and reminds us that, no matter how old we are, we – as humans – are all vulnerable and fragile.

Despite her diagnosis, Susie has not retreated. She is facing her illness head on and undergoing a series of treatments (including what she calls her ‘cocktail days’) that she hopes will see her well enough to join the Sussan Women’s Fun Run on December 8 in Melbourne to raise money for the Breast Cancer Network Australia.

Yes, you read that right: fun run.

Susie always was so much braver than me. I know that to be truer now, than ever.

We normally donate a coffee and cake voucher to our quiet hero, but this time we have made a donation toward Susie’s run on December 8.

We hope you might do the same by clicking on this link: Susie’s run.

Good luck Susie.

 

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